7 Funny Signs You Are In A Nigerian Hospital

02 Nov

Jumia Travel, Africa’s No.1 online
hotel booking portal shares 7 of the funny
signs that you are in a Nigerian hospital.
The nurse shares her opinion on your
In any Nigerian hospital, before you see
the doctor, your temperature and blood
pressure, as well as weight, is recorded.
Do not be surprised when the nurse
makes a bold comment as “Ah, aunty, you
are too big for your height, please work
on it, oh, It is not attractive” or “ Haba,
you are too thin, you no dey chop”.
Basically, Nigerian nurses feel they have
the license to share their opinions with
you and usually, you cannot argue with
The receptionist would rather watch
African Magic
Most hospitals in Nigeria now are starting
to adopt the Electronic Paperwork
system, and almost every receptionist or
front desk staff in Nigerian hospitals,
especially old hospitals, find this
annoying. They prefer to just sit, hand out
files and watch African Magic on
television. In fact, sometimes, they would
ignore patients so they do not miss a
particular scene in a movie.
You wait so long for everything
From submitting your card, to seeing the
doctor, taking tests and collecting your
drugs from the pharmacy, you are bound
to spend almost an entire day at a
Nigerian hospital. The staff seem to take
their sweet time in doing almost
everything, and so even when there is no
crowd, you still have to wait. Good thing
is that most of the hospitals have
canteens and tuckshops where you can go
and eat when you start to get hungry.
There is that IZAL smell
It seems like almost every hospital in
Nigeria, especially the public ones, made
a decision that they would use IZAL, a
strong and very pungent disinfectant, to
clean their environs. This smell usually is
nauseating, especially when the toilet is
not properly cleaned and the offensive
odour of faeces and urine mixes with the
The doctor already knows what is
wrong with you
Most doctors automatically match
symptoms with malaria and typhoid, and
so they rush diagnosis without taking
basic tests. The patients, who are most
times too scared to disagree with the
doctor, just agree with the diagnostics
and eventually go back when the
treatment does not cater to the problem.
Sometimes, you cannot blame them as
giving Nigerian patients’ room to express
themselves fully could encourage them to
over exaggerate their symptoms.
You must buy your meds from the
If you are visiting a doctor in a Nigerian
hospital, be assured that you will have to
buy the medication prescribed from the
hospital’s pharmacy. Even when the
patient requests to have the medication
listed so they can purchase it on their
own, the hospital would refuse. This is
possibly a way for them to make extra
Treatments are overpriced
The bill you receive, usually, is quite
pricey compared to the actual cost of
the medication given to you and
resources used on you. Even worse, the
cost of being admitted is so high that
some hotel rooms are leased for less.
Again, 8 out of 10 hospital bills contain
errors, so you may want to check your bill

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Posted by on November 2, 2016 in Uncategorized


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